Dear Carson-Boy, I just wanted to write you a little note telling you how much I love you. You are such a joy to everyone. You are such a happy little boy. And yes, you're a little boy. You're 20 months old. Almost a 2 year old. Where, oh , where has the time gone? You are growing up and learning so much everyday. You are a chatty little boy and you love to talk. If you're not talking you're making silly noises or making car noises. "Vroom vroom" is probably your most favorite phrase. You are OBSESSED with cars. And the way you say cars is so cute. It sounds like 'kuys' kinda like guys but with a K. You also love trucks or "tuks" as you call them, and you love choo-choos and wowwows. (Ambulance, police cars, fire trucks) You call them wowows because that's the sound they make! :) 


You are my sunshine, my light, my love, my joy, my everything! Nothing brings me more joy then getting to be your mom. I love that I get to be with you all day. You are so happy and good that I honestly miss you when you're sleeping! You are an amazing little person, my boy, and your mama loves you more then you will ever know. Thank you for letting me be your mom. I love love love you forever. 

As of May 29th we have been married for 3 years! It sounds so funny to me to say that. 3 years seems like such a short amount of time. I feel like it's been much longer. I know that sounds bad but I really don't mean it in a bad way. I was talking to my amazing in-laws about it while we were in Florida and my father in law mentioned how when your meant to be together it seems like you've always been together. That's how it's always been for Rob and I. We were best friends since the first day we were together. I was worried, since he was a missionary when I met him, that when we could actually be together it might be awkward. That wasn't the case. I had never felt happiness like I felt when we were together. I also had never felt heart break like I did when I had to go back to Washington. (I went and visited him in Phoenix) It was a literal ache in my heart. Just remembering it now makes me cry. That was over 4 years ago and so much has happened since then. We got married, lived in 2 different apartments, had a baby, gone on lots of trips, bought our first home. We've had ups and we've had downs but at the end of the day, I am so glad it's Rob I get to do these things with. He his mine and I am his. We GET each other. He gets my weird sense of humor and laughs and my craziness. I get his need to always have a project to work on and support that. We really are perfect for each other. I am so blessed to have him as my husband. I am so grateful that he fell in love with me and asked me to be his wife. I love you forever and ever my babe!! I can't wait to see what the next billion years have in store for us :)

Last weekend we spent a lot of time doing yard work. I was mostly squatting and the following days to come had increasing pain in the ball of my foot. I mostly ignored it as I was a dancer and pretty used to pain in the feet. I mean, I used to dance on pointe with broken toes so a little foot pain in nbd to me. Well, it got to the point of not being able to drive and barely being able to walk. The pain was waking me up at night. I went to the doctor and he said to stay off it and ice is as much as possible! That is so impossible!! It's really hard for me because I can't stand when my house is messy. I really, really bothers me. And also, I have a 19 month old. Enough said. Rob has been helpful but he worked all weekend and since he works nights, he sleeps during the day. Luckily, I have stayed off of it some and it is feeling much better. My house is a disaster but I need to be able to walk on my foot because.....

WE'RE GOING TO DISNEY WORLD ON SATURDAY!!!

Okay, I'm a little excited. I have never been to Disney. I am fully prepared to let the 4 year old girl in me out. I'm also super excited because we're going with Rob's family and it's always nice to see them and get to spend time with them. It is also our anniversary that week and we spent our honeymoon in Florida so it will be fun to be back there and the same time of year. Happy 3 years babe! (More on that later)

Not much else has been going on here lately. The weather has been absolutely beautiful so we've been spending a lot of time outside. Carson is awesome as usual and talks non stop. He still has his baby language where he just babbles but he also is putting together 3 and 4 word sentences. He will also repeat pretty much any word we tell him to say. I love that little boy so much!  

Here are some pictures of our recent happenings....

Carson was being naughty and spent some time in timeout

Out and about and Car with his chicken nugget

Wearing Rob's flip flops

One of our 6 Rhododendron bushes 

Car's sippy in my cup holder because I was tired of him throwing it

Enjoying the sunset outside

It amazes me that he sleeps 

I wanted to say Thank You to everyone who commented or sent me personal messages/emails on my last post. I really and truly appreciate all of your kind words and support. And just so you know, we would never make a decision that big based on pressure. We continually pray about things like that and trust in our Heavenly Father to help guide us. I am so grateful for the gospel and grateful for a loving father in heaven who knows us. How amazing is that? He knows us each and loves us and is so willing to help us out. I see blessings in my life everyday and I know without a doubt that he hears our prayers. We might not get an answer right away but he does hear us and he does answer us.

Again, thank you so much for your kind words! Hope everyone has a great weekend!

All through out my life I've had moments where I've felt left out. I'm pretty sure we all have. Some of those times were when I couldn't play with my brother and older kids outside because I had to come in and take a nap. Or when I was the only with a ZERO interest in pokemon cards. I know, I could have pretended to like them and traded cards and what not but seriously, I had no desire to and I just didn't see what the fuss was all about. I was literally the only kid in both 4th grade classes that wasn't trading cards during recess time. I went and swung by myself. Some other times I felt left out where when I was the only one who didn't go to a birthday party because it was on Sunday or I was the only one wearing a shrug over my homecoming dress. Looking back at these moments I realize they were pretty insignificant.

I've reached a point in my life where I'm feeling like that again. Why? Because I'm not pregnant right now and it seems like EVERYONE is. Okay, okay, I know that not everyone is but so many people I know are and 2 of my closest friends are. I feel like now that Carson is 18 months it's time to start  making another one. I wish I didn't feel this pressure but it comes from people around me being pregnant who have kids younger than Carson and it also comes from church. I feel like were the only family with 1 kid. I KNOW a lot of other couples have felt this way too.

Want to know something? Something that makes me feel selfish? The reason I'm not pregnant right now? Because I'm scared. I was so sick last time. Like, really really sick. Loosing 20 pounds in 6 weeks sick. I'm afraid of being that sick and having to take care of Carson. He's not one to sit and watch tv so I have to ALWAYS be watching him. Want to know why else? We're going to Disney World this month and I want to enjoy it. I want to be able to go on the rides and not spend the whole time in the bathroom. That one makes me feel so guilty. Another reason? Carson is so amazing. Seriously, he is so good and easy and we haven't wanted to change that. Our little life is stressful at times but for the most part, pretty simple and peaceful. What if our next baby has colic or is a lot more difficult then Car was? Could I handle that? Oh and remember my PPD? Ya, worried about that too.


All those things make me feel so guilty. But this is where we are right now. Just the 3 of us.

Happy Birthday, Rob!!

Rob is turning 25! Yay for insurance going down! ;) I love you so much, Rob. Thank you for being such an amazing, loving husband and father. Carson and I just absolutely adore you.

Here are 25 facts about my man....

Age:25
Bed size:  Queen
Chore that you dislike:  Putting laundry away
Dogs:  He'd like one someday
Essential start to your day:  Breakfast/protein shake
Favorite color:  Red
Gold or silver: Doesn't really care
Height: 5'8
Instruments you play:  Guitar
Job title: EMT
Kids:  Carson :)
Live:  Washington
Mother's name:  Kathy
Nicknames: Rob, Robby, Roberto, Louis (I call him my his middle name)
Overnight hospital stays:  One when Carson was born. He stayed with us
Pet peeves:  People who are late. He HATES lateness.
Quote from a movie: Hmm...not sure as he isn't much of a tv or movie watcher
Right or left handed:  Righty
Siblings:  Suzie, Andrew, Sharlene and inlaws, Nate, Noelle, Tyler, Mack
Travel ideal:  He would love to go to Alaska
Underwear:  Yep
Vegetable you dislike:  Oh man, he loves veggies. He even likes beets.
What makes you run late: Nothing. He HATES lateness.
X-rays you've had:  Lot's on his mouth and when he cut his thumb off.
Yummy food that you make:  Anything cooked on the grill
Zoo animal:  Penguins 




For his birthday we had some of our friends and cousins come over. We had lots of yummy food and enjoyed visiting and playing games. I think we had 10 people here. It was so much fun to hang out with adults! Carson was amazing and worked the party until it was 7:30 and then he went to bed without a peep. Love that boy. On Sunday, his actual birthday, we wen to the baptism I mentioned before and then went over to my mom's for root beer floats. It was a great weekend and I am so glad that Rob enjoyed it and felt special for his birthday because let's face it, he is special. Happy birthday my lover! I love you!

Deeper thoughts

Sometimes, things happen, and I want to blog about them but then I talk myself out of it because I don't want it to create issues but then I think to myself, who cares? It's my blog right? I seriously go back and forth with these thoughts all the time. I would like to blog about some of the said issues because it would give me a place to vent and also give me some support from some of my fellow blog readers. BUT at the same time, some of my fellow blog readers might not like what I have to say. ANYWAY................


Not much has been happening here lately. Just enjoying some of the sunny days we've had. Oh and all of our trees and bushes are starting to bloom and everything is PINK!!!!!!! It makes me happy :)

This weekend is going to be busy but fun. We have a birthday party for BJ's daughter, a little family get together after that and on Sunday,  Rob's birthday, Rob is baptizing one of the little girls I used to nanny. We are both so excited for this event. Rob said that will be the best present. It's also special that they share the same birthday :) We love their family so much and are so honored to be able to be apart of such a special day.

We're also excited for this summer and some of the plans we have. We'll be going to DISNEYWORLD the end of May. We'll be there for our anniversary and I couldn't think of a better way to spend it! The trip is for Rob's little sisters graduation trip. It's just an added bonus that it falls on our anni. We're also going to Lake Roosevelt for 4th of July with some of Rob's cousins and some of our good friends in Phoenix are also planning on coming and spending some time with us this summer too! (It kills me that friends are going to come see us and family isn't and doesn't plan too) It's going to be a fun summer!

Well I hope everyone has a great rest of the week and a great weekend as well! Thanks for reading my random, scattered posts. Oh and did you like my little passive aggressive insert? If it confused you, reread the first paragraph ;)